Muriel Gray

Muriel Gray
  • Retired Teacher

Muriel Gray, a staunch union activist and longtime teacher at PS 243 in Crown Heights, believed in the power of travel to expand her students’ horizons. She died on Nov. 19, 2023, of heart failure, at age 93.

Muriel, a Brooklyn native and graduate of NYU, began her career as a substitute teacher in 1952 and was hired a year later as a full-time teacher at PS 83 in Crown Heights. In the mid-1950s, Muriel left to spend two years teaching elementary school students on U.S. Air Force bases in Japan and France. Soon after she returned, she moved along with the rest of the PS 83 staff and students to PS 243, a new school down the block, when PS 83 closed in 1959.

“She only came home because her mother missed her so much,” recalled her lifelong partner, Anne Bernstein, who met Muriel in the book room at PS 243 in 1959.

For the bulk of her years at PS 243, Muriel was a 1st-grade teacher but she made the transition to reading teacher in the 1970s.

Muriel GrayAndree Gilmer, her colleague of 30 years, recalled Muriel as a competent, no-nonsense educator who took pride in her students’ achievements. “She was an extraordinary teacher,” said Gilmer.

Muriel’s skills were renowned among her colleagues. “The other teachers would joke about Muriel’s students, ‘I guess they’re reading Chaucer now,’” said Gilmer.

For many years, Muriel and Bernstein served as the school’s UFT chapter leader and UFT delegate, alternating the roles.

“The union was their life,” said her niece, Cynthia Lyons.

Muriel was known for not pulling any punches when it came to standing up to the administration on behalf of her colleagues. “She didn’t mind telling the principal off,” recalled Gilmer.

Lyons, who had a career in management, said she and her aunt had many passionate discussions about unions. “Muriel always said, ‘If you have the opportunity to join a union, you join a union,’” said Lyons.

Muriel spent a couple of years in the 1970s as an acting assistant principal in charge of staff development, a role she didn’t care for, said Bernstein. She returned to teaching for the final decade of her career.

She and Bernstein retired in 1991.

Muriel Gray
Muriel Gray (at left) with her sister, Eleanor Rosen (center), and her lifelong partner, Anne Bernstein (right).

Muriel was an enthusiastic and dedicated world traveler. Over her lifetime, Muriel traveled to all 50 states and every continent. She always extended invitations to her nieces and nephews and their families to join her. “We went to Italy, Iceland, London — all over the place,” said Lyons. “She was so generous.”

Muriel brought the same sense of adventure into her classroom. Muriel applied for a grant that allowed her to take students on weekend field trips to places like Philadelphia to see Independence Hall and Mystic, Connecticut, to see the seaport museum and aquarium. PS 243 had a low-income student body — “most of the children never went off the blocks they lived on,” said Bernstein.

“It was important to her to make an impression on the kids, so they saw what else was out there, that they weren’t just stuck where they were,” said Lyons.

Muriel Gray
Muriel Gray (at left) with her lifelong partner Anne Bernstein.

Muriel’s love of travel did not abate in retirement. At the retirement village in New Jersey where she and Bernstein moved, Muriel ran the community’s singles club, organizing bus trips and European vacations for up to 50 people.

When visiting Muriel at the hospital where she spent her final weeks, Lyons said her aunt told her, “I can’t die now — we have a trip coming up!”

Muriel is survived by her partner, Anne Bernstein; a sister, Eleanor Rosen; two nephews, Peter Rosen and Adam Rosen; two nieces, Tobi Whittemore and Cynthia Lyons; and nine great-nieces and great-nephews.

Condolences can be sent to:

Anne Bernstein
303 Waxwing Dr.
Monroe Township, NJ 08831

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